Certification

Oh yeah, I forgot to update last week. I did pass the exam and am now a Chartered Retirement Planning Counselor. One less thing hanging over my head...not to mention, four new snazzy initials to go on my business cards!

Normal

Last Wednesday, I attended the stroke support group at RHI (where J.J. did his rehab and therapy), but J.J. was busy at work and couldn't get away. We had good attendance, including most of the regulars. But a few minutes before we got started, three women slipped into the chairs along the back wall. This is not a group that often gets new members, and I didn't recognize them, so I was mildly curious.

Group started, and our facilitator asked us to introduce ourselves. When we got to the women in the back, we learned that one was the survivor of a stroke in November 2009. The other two were her friends.

This survivor's grief at the changes that had taken place in her life since her stroke was so thick it was almost tangible. She choked out through sobs that she felt that everyone around her from her doctor to her children was pressuring her to get back to normal life as quickly as possible, but she couldn't fathom how she was going to go back to work or resume any of her other duties. "How did YOUR HUSBAND go back to work after six months?" she asked me accusingly. "All I can do is cry!"

We all took turns explaining that she will never go back to her old life. She has been changed by stroke. Life is not over, though--it is different. It is abnormal. But it is what you have, and it will become what you make it. I hope she believed me when I told her that there will come a day when the stroke is no longer the first thing you'll think of when you wake up every morning and the last thing you think of before you go to sleep every night. I don't think she did. I know I wouldn't have believed it just a few months ago.

Toward the end of the group, I was amazed to reflect on how quickly time has passed since the first support group meeting I attended, when I cried about the changes that had taken place in my life. I won't promise that I'll never cry again, but now the sadness is the exception rather than the rule.

Life goes on, even if "normal" doesn't.

Updates

Stroke News:

J.J. saw Dr. Acula (the neurologist, for those of you who are new to our story) today about the memory issue I mentioned a couple of posts down. The doctor seems to think that J.J.'s brain may still have some slight swelling and this may be putting pressure on the parts of his brain that assist with memory. It's also possible that since he has to "rehearse" what he's going to say to come up with all the words, he thinks he's already said those things out loud. Dr. Acula wants to do some testing to see if he can figure out what the deal is. Of course, we have to find out if our insurance will cover the tests, then away we go.

J.J. also (sort of) started speech therapy on Tuesday. As in, he went, but the therapist was sick and just saw him for a few minutes, then rescheduled. He'll start for real next Tuesday.

Family News:

Eli's had two gymnastics classes now and loves it. He's getting to actually work on the equipment (he was on the high bar and vault tonight!) and is really dedicated to practicing at home. I love seeing him this enthusiastic. He's also joined the Origami Club at school. No really, there's really an entire club dedicated to Origami. If this doesn't get him beat up, I don't know what will. In the meantime, I'm finding tiny paper swans all over the house.

Oh, and we think Eli had chicken pox this week. He started getting a rash that would come and go early last week. The one day I almost kept him home, he had ISTEP, so I sent him. Over the weekend, the rash came back. J.J. took him to the pediatrician on Monday and he said it looks to be viral, probably chicken pox, but he's most likely not contagious now anyway, so don't worry too much about it. I feel like Mother of the Year, let me tell you. But he seems to be much better now.

Leah's just back from a few days of claiming all of her grandparents' attention. She's still loving her swimming class and is spending most of her time stressing about the fact that she goes to Kindergarten in the fall and she wants to make sure she knows how to read before she goes. She's already reading a lot more than she wants to admit, but we're going to keep working with her. She has also decided that she's deathly afraid of all buzzing insects because they might be bees. This has made playing outside VERY interesting.

Other:

At 6:30 a.m. I will go to Prometric to test to become a Chartered Retirement Planning Counselor (otherwise known as the monkey on my back...this is the certification I've been trying to find time to study for since shortly before J.J.'s stroke). Why Prometric thinks I will even be able to recall my name, much less IRA contribution deductibility limits at 6:30 a.m. is beyond me. But anyway, I'd appreciate any good thoughts, prayers and/or extremities-crossing that anyone would like to offer to the cause. I'll update tomorrow evening!

My future grandchildren

This morning while I was doing Leah's hair, she suddenly said, "When I have kids, I'm going to name them Annie, and Erin, and Grammy (what she calls my mom, by the way)." I said, "But what if you have boys? What will you name them?" She answered, "I'll name them Matthew, then Mark, then Luke, then John."

So there you go. The name of her favorite movie character, her mom, her grandma and the apostles. What more could you want?

(Once again, this moment brought to you courtesy of five years of Baptist preschool.)