Still

Gray day.
Gray mood.
I feel like I'm going to fall apart any time now.

Everyone keeps telling me that I need to let others do things for me. I've had offers to cook our meals, watch our kids, run errands for me, etc. The unfortunate thing is that most of the exhaustion I feel isn't physical. It's emotional, mental, spiritual. And no spa day, nap or afternoon at the movies is going to cure that. Short of having a lobotomy or a time machine, I don't know what would.

I love my family. I love my husband. I'm not going to run away from it all.

I'm just mourning the life, family and husband I used to have and wishing I had appreciated these things more while I had them.